I remember when I was little and my Mom would sing to me when I was sick, afraid, couldn't sleep or just because I asked her to. Those were special memories for me. Time that was just her and I laying in bed, me snuggling my Mommy and her enjoying those priceless moments you just can't get back. As a Mom myself I understand now more than ever those precious moments with my kids, how time flies so fast and you have to take every opportunity you can to enjoy those littles.
Tonight was one such night, Little Mermaid playing in the background I had high hopes for a great night as a family and as things happen in life I ended up feeling like I had failed. I gave my husband and son haircuts and all was going well until that fateful moment when the 2 year old daughter decides to throw a fit, get mad when I tell her no and juice ends up on my clean floor and she is now in bed. I hate myself for getting mad, but I'm human and I fail. Yes I said it out loud. I fail.
Of course my daughter doesn't see that part. She sees not being able to finish her movie, not getting snuggles because she's in trouble and is crying for me. Because she wants my comfort even though I'm the one who punished her. And it hit me like a punch in the gut... I'm being harder on myself than she is upset with me. I then went in and she snuggled up with me, and wanted me to sing her favorite lullaby "Return to Pooh Corner" and as I lay there singing I remember my Mom singing that to me. And I realize what I remember is the love and the comfort of my Mom, not the situation that was behind the snuggling (bedtime, sickness, being scared etc.) all I remember is the love. And as I lay there holding my baby girl I pray that what she remembers is the love I feel for her, the snuggles and the singing. Not my temper or her getting in trouble (not that I don't want her to learn not to throw her juice on the floor in protest but you get my point), I hope she remembers that I love her, and that even in the worst of times nothing she can ever do will change my love for her, same goes for my son. Just like my heavenly Fathers love for me, and while I screw up and make a mess sometimes His love for me never changes. His desire for me to learn and grow from these experiences and earthly decisions doesn't change. Just as He is shaping me, and teaching me everyday, so am I to shape and teach my kids. And that was a humbling thought. The greatest gift I can give this world is 2 more believers who strive to live for Christ.
I'm still learning how to be a good Mom, and even when they're grown and gone I'll still be learning. I think for us Mom's that's a hard lesson to learn. We are so quick to judge each other and not only does that make our jobs as Momma's harder, but it's drawing away from how Christ calls us to act. Just like it says in Romans:
Romans 12:1-2 "So here’s what I want you to do, God helping you: Take your everyday, ordinary life—your sleeping, eating, going-to-work, and walking-around life—and place it before God as an offering. Embracing what God does for you is the best thing you can do for him. Don’t become so well-adjusted to your culture that you fit into it without even thinking. Instead, fix your attention on God. You’ll be changed from the inside out. Readily recognize what he wants from you, and quickly respond to it. Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to its level of immaturity, God brings the best out of you, develops well-formed maturity in you." (the Message)
Did you see that? Where it says "Unlike the culture around you, always dragging you down to it's level of immaturity, God brings out the best of you, develops well-formed maturity in you." We Mom's need to pay heed to that verse, instead of dragging each other down, and putting each other down, we should strive to help each other in love. Strive to hold back unwanted advice and listen instead, sometimes we just need to cry for a minute, I know though most of mine is in private. When you see that Mom at the store struggling, exhausted and on the edge of tears herself the last thing she wants to hear is "You've got your hands full there!" no, she wants a sympathetic glance, she wants to know she's not alone or a failure, that someone else understands how hard it is to be a Mom. I urge you, next time you see a Mom struggling, offer up a prayer for her instead of thinking down on her. We all have bad days, yes us Mom's too and so do our littles. Bad days don't make for bad kids, or bad parenting. It simply means we're human and still learning and growing.
My prayer as a Mom is to be their example of Christ, to teach them His love and to show that love to others too. That is my prayer for you too!
Kim
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